Don’t go dotty over the damn potty!

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I’ve come to the conclusion that potty training twins trumps my loathing of spiders.
This is what I’ve learnt…

1) Don’t believe your child when they tell you they don’t need a wee. Watch them like a robotic hawk. After the 47th time you’ve asked the question ‘do you need a wee?’ and they wee in your sandals three minutes later, you may need to lie down.

2) During training, you’ll think of nothing else. Your house will smell like a multi-storey cesspit or a urinal. Make sure the Prosecco is chilling in the fridge on these days.

3) Stickers, princess knickers, stickers on the potty, not even the prettiest Elsa knickers will get your child to wee on the potty UNLESS they want to. I could have opened my own market stall of Frozen knickers before I worked this one out. Even if they WANT TO wear those knickers it doesn’t mean they won’t wee in them.

4) If you’re out and about and it’s a windy day, pause before you tip the contents of the potty into a bush or secluded spot. The wind going in the wrong direction can have a disastrous effect!

5) You may never have another meal in peace: the sit-down dinner equates to small children feeling the urge to empty their bladder. For one not to get too irate, one must embrace cold dinners. A cold dinner is better than a wee soaked carpet.

For sure.

And a sense of humour during these dark brown times is essential! 😉

What would be your potty training tips?

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2 thoughts on “Don’t go dotty over the damn potty!

  1. ejfrostuk says:

    Arg! Why didn’t I know about this 10 years ago when I was potty-training my kid?! I could have saved a fortune in Disney knickers. We had a CLOSET-full of Disney Princess knickers. She wee-ed (or worse) in all of them. Usually at Tesco.

    I have no potty-training tips, except to avoid starting potty-training while living with your in-laws. Even if your kid is the last kid in your playgroup/neighbourhood/the entire world to potty train, do not start potty training at your in-laws house. Just wait until your new house is finished and your kid can pee (or worse) all over your new carpet instead of theirs.

    Liked by 1 person

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