When things go wrong you want to scream!

So here is some advice from the clumsy Curly-Haired Essex Bird.

1) Never use an eyelash curler! On two occasions I have held my lashes in this steel scissor-like grip only to ‘slip’ and rip off nearly all of my eyelashes. I made this mistake when I was 16 and, being far too dumb, I then did it at 18.

I was a stupid teenager.


It looks like a medieval tool of torture, now I come to think of it.


In hindsight, allowing me to put a cutter-like contraption near my eyes was always going to be devastatingly ‘high risk.’

But I’m not the only one.

Miley Cyrus was after ‘bigger, bolder lashes’ but she accidentally cut off a chunk of her lashes with an eyelash curler, too. And did you know that ‘if you don’t clean off the old mascara from previous uses it can cause your lashes to stick and even be ripped out?’

No one mentions this in Boots or Superdrug, now, do they?


2) Secondly, don’t ever pick a spot. Not ever! If you’re ever in THAT dilemma ‘to squeeze or not to squeeze?’ just think of a big red ball because, if you do ‘squeeze’, that zit will swell to alarming volcanic proportions! Just get the concealer out and become a master of art and camouflage.


3) Also, don’t use hair removal cream on your upper lip on a day when you’ve got to look nice. It just takes one or two minutes to think over your shopping, or your interview questions (or the vows of your wedding!) and it could mean one burnt upper lip. Never put it on for more than two minutes. Not in any circumstances. Otherwise, you’ll look like the kid who over slurped on her blackcurrant. And no amount of foundation will hide those red whiskers.

You were warned!

4) Finally, don’t use fake tan unless you are a beautician or very talented. Brides often make this mistake. An overly generous coating can make a lady look more suitable for the old Tango advert rather than a wedding. Go to a proper beautician. This goes for any occasion. Why look like you’ve eaten your body weight in carrots when you really don’t have to?



I hope this has been helpful! 😉 xxx

Sources of info:

seventeen online magazine


my own dizzy head




  1. Hamish says:

    I enjoyed the post – but as a guy, I was in the comfort space of thinking “Ha… I don’t have to worry about these myself.”, which makes any article immensely more enjoyable. And then, I came across the point on zits.

    My zitty days are behind me, but that still hit a sore spot. I remember once I had a bright red one right at the tip of my nose, making me look like Rudolph lighting the way for Santa. Usually, when you have those things on your face, you can at least ignore it by throwing away all the mirrors nearby, but when you have one on the tip of your nose, you see it all the time. All. the. time.

    You cannot CANNOT help but pick it… which only makes it worse – you get front row tickets to a made-for-you feature on volcanic eruptions. Ugh..

    Liked by 1 person

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